I just wasn’t up for the struggle today…

I haven’t posted for a while, but I came face-to-face with the dreaded OMG! DEATH FAT! WHY AREN’T YOU DEAD ALREADY? talk from a doctor today. A 70 year old, paternalistic, condescending, old-school, doctor-is-god doctor who was the only doctor available for me to see. Today, at any rate.

He asked me “Do you think you are overweight?” in a condescending manner. When I responded, “Yes, I’m fat”, he smirked like he had scored a point (fatties never know they are fat and need to be told, often).

He ridiculed me when I repeatedly asked for a larger blood pressure cuff (what would I know, I’m only a fat female) and ignored me when I said that the metal fastener was cutting into my arm (fatties deserve pain). He stated my blood pressure of 120/90 was “high” and was a warning that I was about to drop dead (and clearly, it had nothing to do with the too small cuff or my
stress and ANGER
temporarily going through the roof).

He quoted discredited actuarial tables at me to prove that I was a walking, talking death bomb. He listed every disease on the planet from stroke to kidney disease to scare me into compliance. He told me it was for my own good. He refused to believe I am healthy. Afterall, hadn’t my blood pressure just proven him “right”?

He refused to listen to me at all.

He wrote on my medical record in CAPITAL LETTERS that he had WARNED this fatty she was going to DIE, while telling me what he was doing his duty and “No-one could say I haven’t warned you”.

I tried, really I did, but by this stage, I was just too weary and sick to convince this aging, bullying doctor that even fat women deserve respect and may not, in fact, be walking timebombs.

He finally dealt with what I had actually gone to see a doctor for in the last 2 minutes of the appointment, but even then had to have a for-my-own-good snark about my weight.

On the way out of his office he told me he was a very kind doctor, because he hadn’t insisted on weighing me. I just smiled and said, “Oh, that’s OK. I know how much I weigh, thanks”.

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15 Responses to “I just wasn’t up for the struggle today…”


  1. 1 wriggles Tuesday, 21 July 2009 at 8:27 pm

    I’m too annoyed on your behalf to say more than I’m sorry that you had to face this man,what an absolute idiot.

    You showed real grace and presence of mind to say that at the end.

    Come to mention it, you showed that grace all the way through the ‘consultation'(your doc should remind himself of the meaning of that term) but that made no impression on him.

    Well, you can lead a horse to water…….

  2. 2 meowser Tuesday, 21 July 2009 at 8:43 pm

    A systolic BP of 120 is NOT elevated, dude. This guy was just plain old fucking with you. (Your diastolic was a little elevated, but that’s mostly heart rate, and like you said, you were pretty amped up.) I do hope you’re not stuck with him.

  3. 3 Fatadelic Tuesday, 21 July 2009 at 8:55 pm

    Yeah, I got that he was pulling all actual and imagined ammunition to scare the pants off me (didn’t work). And thankfully I’m not stuck with him. My normal doctor (who isn’t fat phobic in the least) wasn’t available at short notice so I had to take whichever doctor was available. Never seeing this particular old fart again if I can help it, though.

    • 4 Nicole Tuesday, 21 July 2009 at 9:54 pm

      You might also want to report him… He works for you, after all.

  4. 5 Kath Tuesday, 21 July 2009 at 9:52 pm

    Time to find a new doctor my lovely! I take my Medicare (which I pay for with my taxes), my health insurance and my own money ELSEWHERE when they treat me like this. I am paying them, not the other way around.

  5. 6 bri Tuesday, 21 July 2009 at 11:00 pm

    What an arsehole. Him, not you.
    I am really sorry you had to deal with that shit when you were there for something else. *hugs*

  6. 7 Twistie Wednesday, 22 July 2009 at 1:01 am

    Yet another reminder that a license to practice medicine doesn’t automatically guarantee that the holder has either compassion or common sense.

  7. 8 living400lbs Wednesday, 22 July 2009 at 2:43 am

    Yet another reminder that a license to practice medicine doesn’t automatically guarantee that the holder has either compassion or common sense. is grown-up enough to be trusted to look both ways before crossing the street.

  8. 9 Bianca Wednesday, 22 July 2009 at 2:56 am

    What an ass!! I’m surprise you were able to restrain yourself from kicking him in the balls. Thank goodness he’s not your regular doctor.

  9. 10 Meems Wednesday, 22 July 2009 at 3:39 am

    Is he in the same medical practice as your regular doctor? I’d at the very least mention this experience next time you see your regular GP. The fat-phobia and condescension are inexcusable.

  10. 11 Sarah Wednesday, 22 July 2009 at 7:00 am

    Oh heck, that experienced must have be painful. You were a lot kinder than I would have been.

    When I had the flu, my blood pressure skyrocketed to 140/80 – it’s usually in the range of 110/80. My doctor said it was fine – I’m back to normal pressure now, and got over my flu. I’m sure he understood the stress I was under at the time, and applied it to the reading.

    However, this is the same doctor who prescribes diet pills to women with a BMI rate in the “normal” category. Sigh…..

  11. 12 Julia Tuesday, 25 August 2009 at 12:04 am

    I have had this happen to me several times. And now the thought of going to see a doctor stresses me out so much that I almost have a panic attack. Which then gives me a high BP reading and then a lecture from the Doctor.

    You are so lucky to have a nice Doctor as your normal Doctor and were strong enough cope with the grumpy old Doctor.

  12. 13 KellyK Tuesday, 25 August 2009 at 10:35 pm

    Wow. That’s just sucky, and you have my sympathy. I’m really glad he’s not your regular dr., and I hope you at least got what you actually came in for dealt with sufficiently.

    The bit with the blood-pressure cuff is probably the worst. They do have measurements on them for a reason, and ignoring the fact that **you were in pain** is just beyond the pale.

    I know you don’t need the reminder, but you don’t *have* to let them take your blood pressure with a too-small cuff. If they can’t be bothered to get the larger one, then it can’t be that important, right?

    ((hugs))

  13. 14 Blimp Thursday, 10 September 2009 at 5:04 am

    Did that doctor learn anything in school that the Nazis didn’t teach (how to starve and work people to death)? That’s what I’d ask him.


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