Lassoing a Husband

This oh-so-subtle heading is the title of a chapter from How to Attain and Retain Beauty written in 1935. Below is an extract from that chapter:

Given the stage to herself, with only men for company, even the shyest of women — the one you would least suspect of sex-calculation — gains confidence, and without very much effort uses the old wiles to hold your audience. In such circumstances it is immaterial whether she coquettes or not, for in the end one man, or all of them, will not leave her side.

There is an old saying that with enough propinquity any woman may marry any man she chooses, and its truth is trebled when that woman has the man, and the place for her exclusive attention.

The cruel truth about this play of appeal between the sexes is that the woman with much sex-appeal may not attract the man with whom she falls in love. Men will run after the will o’ the wisp, and certainly hunt for it, but they are frightened of being married to someone whose sex-appeal is the talk of the town. They cannot imagine marriage turning her into a wife, and it is a poser whether after marriage the woman blazing S.A. in capitals means any more to her husband than the girl who is normally attractive and desirable means to hers.

There are a hundred ways of considering these overrated facinatations in a woman. We are all trying to find happiness and intermittant satisfaction in our lives, and sex-appeal, in common with every other natural or artificial grace, must be regarded as a valuable personal asset — and no more. You may be a happier woman with your fair share of good looks, charm, womanly appeal, intelligence and an admirable character than the superlative beauty of social London or the notorious ‘It Girl’ of the United States. There is less real romance in having regiments of men paying you compliments and seeking your favor that in having one man who genuinely loves you and to whom you are a woman to be protected, cared for, respected, considered and comforted for always. Cold comfort this, probably, for the woman who has never been flattered by man, never been told that she is beautiful. But this is not right, for there are compliments for every healty, normal woman if she wants them, but she must make herself inviting in her femininity.

So dust off the old wiles, and make your femininity inviting… but not too inviting, you will o’ the wisp. Remember, the aim of the game is to snare the man for keeps, and not for an evening.


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